Top 10 things you should NEVER say to a customer

by Kevin Stirtz on March 23, 2010 · 7 comments

Much of how we help people deliver better customer service is with examples. These are fun and useful because we all have them (since we’re all customers.) And sometimes it helps to look at examples of things we shouldn’t say to customers. That is, if we want them to keep coming back.

So, here is my top 10 list of things you should never say to a customer:

1. “Now just calm down.”

Is there ever a situation where this has the intended effect? I can just see it: “Oh thank you Mr. Customer Service Rep. for helping me realize how crazy I was acting. Good thing you’re here to help me behave like a responsible person.”

Uh, I don’t think so. More like they’ll get even more angry while they tell YOU to calm down. They’ll escalate the matter and they’ll probably become a former customer.

Listen, let them vent, have them talk to someone else if they want. But never tell them to calm down.

2. “It’s not me, it’s that other department.”

Never pass the buck or blame someone else, especially if they’re part of your company. You don’t look any better or smarter by doing so. But you do appear uninterested in solving the customer’s problem. Your time is better spent fixing and helping rather than blaming and finger-pointing.

3. “Your call is very important to us.” (Said in a recorded message.)

We hear this so often we ignore it. And we should. A recorded message is not the place to tell your customers how much you value their business. Do it with a real, live, caring human being. That’s a message your customers will believe (and respond to).

4. “You made a mistake.”

We all know customers make mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. But when you point it out in a direct and blatant way, you risk offending or embarrassing your customer. How would you like it? Instead focus on helping them understand the right way to do things so they won’t make the mistake again.

5. “We’d like to help, but it’s our company policy…”

With too many employees this is just an easy way to get out of doing something they’d rather not do.

If you really want to help then find a way. Don’t hide behind a company policy. And if you can’t work around the policy, offer an alternative or escalate the matter for the customer. If your customers sees you are trying to help, they’ll be less disappointed even if they don’t get exactly what they want.

6. “Please take a number.” (When you’re the only customer there)

If I were the customer in this situation, “huh?” is about the only response I’d be able to muster, assuming I didn’t just walk out. But it happens. People get so focused on policies, procedures, systems and rules that they forget about a little tool called “common sense”.

7. “I’m sorry if you feel that way.”

People often say this as an apology. But it’s not. Because it puts the blame on the customer.

If you’re sorry then say so. Don’t qualify it. When customers hear an apology like this they understand what you’re doing. You’re saying, “I know I’m supposed to apologize but I really don’t want to.”

A better option is to just say “I’m sorry this happened” or simply “I’m sorry”.

It tells the customer you are actually sorry for the situation the customer is in without making you responsible for it.

8. “You’ll have to talk to the corporate office about that.”

If a customer has feedback, a request or a complaint, they don’t care who YOU have to forward it to. They don’t care that another person in you organization will deal with it. What they want is for YOU to get the ball rolling. It’s not the customer’s job to go on a wild goose chase trying to find the exact person who should handle their situation. That’s YOUR job.

9. “No one else has complained about…”

This one always floors me. Are we taking a survey? Are we voting on the situation? If enough other customers have a problem then you’ll listen to me (or handle my problem)? Is that really how they do things?

Of course, that’s ridiculous. But I’ve heard employees (and managers) say this all too often. The problem is they are focusing on their perspective. They should be focusing on the customer and helping solve a problem.

10. “Step 7″ (or any other step in your script that’s already been covered or is not relevant to the situation)

Because scripts and checklists are all the rage now, employees are scripted to death. Many feel (and some are told) they are not there to think but to follow the script. And often that’s exactly what they do, even when it makes no sense and wastes the customer’s time.

If you have a script or checklist, pay attention to the real world too. Your customers will thank you.

These are just MY top things you should never say to a customer. What can YOU think of?

(Thanks to Barry Moltz (#2), Chip Bell (#3, #4 & #5), Lisa Ford (#1), Jim Logan (#5), Laurie Brown (#5) and Ray Miller (#6 & # 10) for contributing their helpful ideas to this article.)

Learn how you can deliver top customer service to every customer every time

Kathy Clark March 23, 2010 at 7:15 pm

Great points! It’s amazing how we can often lose sight of who pays the bills and why taking care of the customer is so critical. A key to training should not only be what not to say to customers but a well thought out scripted response to those awkward questions or complaints from customers. Good article!

Kevin Stirtz March 24, 2010 at 8:09 am

Hi Kathy – I’m not a big fan of scripts. But your idea has merit in that people can (and should) be trained in various situations. Most customer complaints and many awkward situations are repeats so a company could develop a list of them based on frequency of occurrence. Then work with staff on how they might respond. Not a script but a personal and considered response that helps the customer.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts Kathy!

Glenn March 23, 2010 at 8:05 pm

Kevin,

Another, I think more common variation of number 2 is, “Well, you need to call….”

No, the employee needs to own the complaint and the company must empower him or her to do so.

Great poost.

Glenn

Kevin Stirtz March 24, 2010 at 7:05 am

Absolutely agreed Glenn – If the employee passes the buck the customer is more likely to believe they (and the company) really don’t care about help them.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

KS

Don May 11, 2010 at 11:25 am

I have a question in regard to point #1. What is your suggestion when a customer, either in-store or by phone, is being belligerent and profane? Sometimes the customer wants something we cannot provide, but in some cases, they are upset about something… unusual.
For example, I received a call once where a customer was complaining about a product, and I was typing in notes while she gave me details. She asked if I was typing, and I replied that I was so that I would have her feedback on record, and she literally began screaming, saying that I should do nothing but sit and listen. Her voice was so loud that people 3 cubicles away could hear her through my headset.
Another example would be a customer in a store who wants to return a damaged, worn, well-used piece of merchandise, and when we politely refuse the return, they become angry and disruptive in the store. We have even had occasions where they have threatened associates and/or disturbed other customers.
Do you feel that it is inappropriate to politely remind them that this is a place of business, and ask them to please conduct themselves accordingly?

Stephen Hendren - presentation skills trainer August 16, 2010 at 6:42 am

With reference to your customer objecting to the typing i use to have similar problems when i dealt with customer complaints. I got round it by asking EVERY customer who complained if it was ok if i took notes while they spoke to be sure i got all the details correct. That way you have their tacit permission and have given a subtle reassurance that you will be paying attention. It sounds to me like your first customer was simply looking for things to complain about but could not have done so if you first gain her permission to get notes. If the person isn’t calmed by your assured attention and continues to be personally abusive then it is perfectly acceptable to point out that their behaviour is preventing you from helping them effectively. In extreme cases (which i have only had to deal with once) i have refused to deal with a customer who was being threatening and abusive until they moderated their behaviour. Everybody has a right to be treated reasonably and fairly, even when they have mad a mistake.

Jas January 20, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Never say “is that all?” it angers me to no end!

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